Sales vs Marketing: A Love-Hate Story (written from the perspective of a Wannabe Stand-up Comic)


July 04, 2025

At a recent seminar I conducted for B2B marketeers this is the question which was asked of me. While I said let’s settle the debate once and for all and gave them an answer which satisfied them all (I think) here’s a more humorous way at creating a clear distinction between Sales and Marketing

Sales vs Marketing: A Love-Hate Story (written from the perspective of a Wannabe Stand-up Comic)

You know, they say Sales and Marketing are like a married couple in corporate India. They live in the same house, fight over the same budget, blame each other when things go wrong, and try to produce something beautiful, like a campaign that actually works.

So let’s break this down.

Marketing: The Dreamer

Marketing is that cool, artsy cousin who says things like “Let’s humanize the brand,” and truly believes the world can be saved with the right font. Helvetica, to be specific.

Marketing throws parties. Big ones. They’ll call it a ‘product launch,’ but it has champagne, bean bags, a DJ, and someone dressed up as a Disney character / humanised product giving out handouts / brochures. Marketing will spend ₹50 lakhs on a campaign and say, ‘The leads will come. We’ve created awareness. It's all about the brand recall.’

Sales will mutter : ‘I just need a phone number. One bloody phone number.’ I need qualified leads –people who have intent to buy preferably – immediately.

Sales: The Hustler

Sales is the guy/ girl who is on calls all day, they know people, they remember birthdays, and they have three phones - none of which are on silent.

While Marketing is writing a 30-slide deck called “Customer Personas and the Future of Belonging”, Sales is trying to convince Sharma ji that this vacuum cleaner will change his life and maybe even his marriage.

Sales doesn’t care about CTR, CPC, or TOFU-MOFU-BOFU. Sales wants one thing: the deal. The cheque. The signature. The client saying, ‘Done, send the invoice.’

Closing is all what matters to them

WHEN THEY MEET : Now picture a meeting where both Sales and Marketing are in the same room.

Marketing: ‘Our campaign reached 3 million people last week!’

Sales: ‘Yes, but we got 2 leads. And one was my uncle.’

Marketing: ‘But did you get the impressions!’

Sales: ‘I don’t care about impressions. I want sales and customers breaking my door.’

It’s like watching a romantic comedy where the couple is perfect for each other but keeps fighting for 90 minutes. Only they just forward each other emails and cc the boss.

The Real Difference

In simple terms:

  • Marketing gets you to swipe right.
  • Sales convinces you to meet for coffee… and maybe get married.

Marketing says, ‘Let’s tell a story.’

Sales says, ‘Let’s close the deal.’

Marketing runs ads with soft lighting and background music.

Sales sends you 11 follow-up emails and a WhatsApp message that says “Just checking in :)”

Can They Coexist?

Absolutely. Like chai and biscuit. Like biryani and raita. Like Sharma ji and unsolicited advice.

Because when Marketing and Sales actually align - when the storytelling meets the selling - magic happens. The customer not only buys the product, they remember who sold it, why they bought it, and they come back for more.

Just don’t let Sales write your Instagram captions or let Marketing negotiate with procurement. This is what happens when product heads and sales heads start dictating posts and communication

Sales and Marketing are two essential sides of the same coin - One attracts, the other converts. One builds the story, the other sells the story and reels in the customer with the sale and gets the cheque home.

Marketing spins the story, builds the brand, while sales sell the story to the distributors, retailers, direct customers in case of B2B. Sales ensures repeat orders with more stories which are created by marketing.

Marketing creates the stories: sales sell the stories. If you have a great Sales department but no marketing, the image of your company is going to go nowhere - If you have a great Marketing department and a weak sales department -The brand will be much loved perhaps but the sales will be abysmal.

In India in B2B companies Sales & Marketing is clubbed together as a job function. In my opinion that is like clubbing Accounts & Finance together. Both are distinct functions. One should not be confused with the other.

Would love to hear your opinion on this.

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